Treasure hunt

I was wondering if 

I should find back my friends who I enjoyed talking to but

disappeared because I didn't stand up for myself or tried to clarify to them but

should I ask them if they could be my friend again and 

believe in the worthless penniless ugly me 

I'm not someone who can express my thoughts very well

and not someone who can defend myself very well either

becoming someone who is used to getting blamed 

or would rather become the sacrifice 

becoming extremely stupid in the process 

but no matter how I think about it 

there's no way I can be a fox and ...

what if one day I couldn't fight for what I want 

so .. I probably should start on my ex friends first 

IDK

And

I'm applying for an internship in Denmark

Since the United States didn't work out but 

that doesn't seem to be working out either 

I think .. I'll keep trying but urgh so many buts

IDK frustrated

Song of the day: 

Cover - Lies (G.O.D) by Lee Soojung